Love has always been the cause of so many things in life. But today love is causing me pain and confusion.
I hate this feeling. The feeling when you know deep inside of you there is something that you feel towards someone and yet you don’t want it to surface because you don’t want to lose what you already have with someone. You wanted to chose to stay that way but you can hear the beating of your heart. Instead of you being happy you turn to be troubled.
I know this feeling years back. But back then I know that its not the right thing to do. I wanted to be a better than the one who loves, because I wanted to be the one that will stand by when needed. Someone to look up to when help and guidance is needed. I know that from the very beginning and yet just lately emotions are rushing into me. Probably it was triggered by some unspoken words. By some unusual terms pass by into me. Probably I misinterpret it; and I am hoping it was just a wrong misinterpretation.
How I wish it is a feeling that I would embrace but in reality I don’t know what to do about it. Do I pursue it or put it back to the deepest corners of my heart where it should be. I don’t know what to do and I don’t know if I am ready for the answers.